please help me

by chris

a woman i love very much has crohns ...shes moody and vey emotionally unstable. does crohns affect you phycologically? shes very negitive and dosent dsee good in anything,,like she is depressed severly. she wont go antwhere out of the house but work.and to the store will not socialize ,,yet she is a sales person, sounds confusing you should be me . i would like to know how to get along with her better.......would love to talk to anyone that could help me..

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Please help NEW
by: Annette Young

Hi Chris,

Thanks for writing in. I hope by the time you read this, things will settle down and your girlfriend will be feeling much better. I wanted to reply to this post because unless someone has experienced Crohn's disease for themselves, they really have no idea of the extent of the effects. Not only can it be extraordinarily painful and aggressive in its attack on the body, it can affect people from a psychological point of view as well.

As you have found out Chris, it can be very hard to live with and there is a lot of pressure on partners, family and friends because it is frustrating to have to watch the hold that this disease can have over their loved ones and yet not be able to do much to help.

You don't discuss her physical symptoms but I am guessing that she is not feeling good in itself and is probably in or has been in a lot of pain. For many people, the constant running backwards and forwards the toilet is enough to stop them from wanting to go out, just in case something bad happens. She may feel extremely fatigued, nauseous and have lost a lot of confidence.

I speak to a great many people with Crohn's disease and one of the things that comes up each time is the feeling of frustration and the ease at which it is possible to feel depressed. Sometimes there seems to be no light at the end of the tunnel, the pain is continuous, exhaustion is overwhelming and their bodies are too unsettled to want to make an effort to go out.

This can make people very isolated and in turn leads to depression. It's a vicious cycle.
I am sure that she appreciates your presence and knows that you want to help her and although it's hard, you just have to be patient and understanding, because the only person who really knows what she's feeling is your girlfriend.

On a lighter note, you may find that the Crohn's symptoms ease up and she may start to feel much better in herself and want to start going back out again and to lead a more normal life. I assume she is on medication? If it's not working, she should go back to her doctor and they can try out a different one. Other than that, it is a case of her watching her diet and making sure she has a simple life as possible which does seem to help reduce some of the impact of Crohn's.

I wish you much luck.

Help for Crohn's
by: Anonymous

Vitamin D3 deficiency is a major factor for Crohn's.
Try like myself taking the above dosage, but always
with a spoon of Flax or Fish oil, to optimize absorption. Vitamin D will give you energy. Eliminate sugars and replace with Honey
in everything! Honey is a mono-saccharides, and easily
digested by Crohn's afflicted bowels, therefore less
bacterial growth that causes inflammation.
Try also take 1/2 tspn of Manuka Honey, on empty stomach 1 hour before a meal. It heals any wound inside and outside the body!!! I tried it when I had
pain from Crohn's attack, and the pain was gone.($12 a small jar) but lasts for a long time.
Try to avoid smoking, and coffee only once a day or every other day!
Instead of coffee, to be alert and awake, put a dash or two of CAYENNE PEPPER
into 1/2 cup of warm water, or into salads, soups, any dishes. It does
wonders! It also takes pain away!!!

You will not regret implementing the above suggestions, as you are getting
them from a Crohn's sufferer like yourself, who is mature in years, and with
experience, and who has tried everything.
I have many more helpful suggestions for emergency situations.
If you'd like to get the information, you can e-mail me:

If you don't try, you'll never know...

Check with your G.P. your thyroid level,
and hemoglobin level as well.
You might need Iron pill (better from vegetable
source), sells them cheaply - Item #CTL4026594. Take 3 a day with vitamin C - 500-1000 mg, for 3 months.

by: Anonymous

Hi Chris,

If you want to email, I can try to help. I've been in remission for several yrs. There are other things out there that work well besides med's. sincerely, Jeff

by: Stacey

Hi - I have crohns and my husband will tell that i am not a pleasure when things are bad. For me it is a combination of reaction to meds and the disease. U need to make her feel that she can empower herself and that you dont understand but that you want to be what she needs u to be when things are tough for her. U cannot fix it though - she needs to take control herself and know that she has the disease it does not have her. She should speak to a prof to help her get a working plan of how to cope. A step by step to get through the bad days so she feels that she is in control to a certain degree. For you - it is often a case of putting ur own feelings aside and have faith that when she is feeling good she will make it up to you. i hope this helps.

Please Help Me
by: Anonymous

Crohns disease is a hard disease to have. It is even harder due to the fact that it is hard to explain to others and have them understand what you are going through. I was diagnosed a year ago. When people find out I have it, they often ask what it is. When you tell them that it is an inflammatory bowel disease, they don't grasp the severity of it. My family tries to be supportive, but I still find myself being depressed. My suggestion to you would be to offer sincere support to her. Be there for her.

Please Help Me
by: JoAnne

I can tell you that Crohn's has effected me like that. It is a shock to you to find out that you have the disease in the first place and the symptoms that come with it is enought to make you depressed. My husband and friends still help me with depression and I have had this stuff for 9 years. I can tell you learn about the disease and then talk with her with the understanding of the problems she is facing. Just knowing someone cares enough to get all the information and wanting to talk about what she is going though is great, but sometimes you just have to let her be to herself and pray that God will help her though the tough times. This is not a easy illness to handle on a day to day basis. So be patient and stand by her though everything and let her know that you know about the disease, but really don't know how she feels but you are there to listen if she wants to talk. Hope this helps.

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