Crohn's and relationships

I was diagnosed with crohn's three years ago and have been going through the ups and downs of lifestyle changes and medications to control my symptoms. I have been able to identify stress as a large cause to my flare up's, among other things, however this seems to be the greatest. I know stress is apart of everyday life, but ever since I told my fiance' that stress is a large factor to my disease he seems to be stressing me out more and more without making any effort to a resolution. I do what I can on my end, staying calm, breathing techniques, etc. but he does not seem to get it and I do not know how to get through to him. He even goes as far to say that I am using my disease as an excuse. I do not know how to speak up with out making it an excuse as well as to look out for my best interest and get through to him. Please help.

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backpain NEW
by: Kelly

Wish to know about if backpain is related to Crohn's disease. disease

Crohn's and relationships NEW
by: Annette Young


Thank you so much for writing in. You truly have my sympathy because I was in a similar situation a year ago and my health was suffering badly because of my relationship.

Stress is one of the main triggers for Crohn's disease and so, irrespective of all that you do to try to offset the stress, the cause is going to ensure that you continue to get even more stress.

In the end, I had to make a tough decision to leave my partner because I felt so depressed, ill and almost suicidal. I was rock bottom and could not see my way out of it. Leaving was extremely painful but in a way, a relief too as it meant I cold gradually get better and to start thinking about my health. I kept saying to my partner that he was making things worse and it was affecting me badly, but that didn't stop. In fact, the worse I got, the more irritable he became.

I don't know the cause of your problems of course but it doesn't sound like he is being very supportive and right now you need a great deal of support. Perhaps he is frightened by how the condition affects you? I don't know.

You are on the right track re relaxation techniques but you can also try meditation and yoga. They are wonderful to help you look and feel better and with greater clarity of mind. Yoga can be very gentle but powerful as regards its benefits. The meditation can be used to offset stress and to help you to feel better in yourself. You can also do healing meditations.

You do need support though so do feel free to write in at any point.

I wish you the best of luck,

Annette Young

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